The longer I think what I've been doing in the last weeks the more I realize, that I'm currently lacking motivation to do anything.
Yes, I've been gathering quite some overtime hours, but the additional work only covers the issue that I have problems with getting out of bed as early as I did in my past. Currently my daily works starts at around 8.30am while before it was possible that I've been productive already before 7am. Maybe this is a sideeffect of my sleeping-issues which have eased a bit but are still present nevertheless. What it also means, that I'm working until late in the evening now and arrive home when most of the others are already in bed.
And I do not have the motivation to do anything productive at home...
Of course, I still have my personal list of things to accomplish, what to repair, how to extend something at home, what to do to finish more rooms in the house. What's missing, is the spark which makes me take one of the points on the list and start working on it, be it repairing the silicone-isulation in the kitchen or organizing a tiler who helps me finishing the toilet and bathroom. It could also be as little as to tidy up some rooms which still have to be cleaned after a lot of room became free.
But no, mostly I just do something to not recognize the time going by. Nothing of these things have sustaining value. Everything feels empty.
I want to change that, but just wanting it is not enough...| Permalink